Helen Hadden Psychotherapist

The Psychology of Ghosting

Today, we have to cope with stresses and questions about ourselves that didn't exist before, including the isolation of home working, being ghosted online, and being overwhelmed by social media. Here, we will look at the term 'ghosting' in relation to online dating.

Online dating has revolutionized how people meet potential partners, but it has also introduced new challenges, one of which is the phenomenon known as "ghosting." Ghosting occurs when someone suddenly and without explanation cuts off all communication with someone they've been dating or chatting with online. This can be a hurtful and frustrating experience for the person who's been ghosted. Here are some insights into why ghosting happens and how to cope with it:

Why Does Ghosting Happen in Online Dating?

  1. Conflict Avoidance: Some people resort to ghosting because they find it easier to disappear than to confront difficult conversations or potential conflicts. They may not know how to express their feelings or reasons for ending communication.

  1. Overwhelm: Online dating can lead to multiple connections simultaneously. When someone feels overwhelmed by the number of conversations or potential matches, they might ghost to reduce their emotional load.

  1. Lack of Interest: Unfortunately, some individuals lose interest or have second thoughts about pursuing a relationship but choose to ghost instead of communicating their change of heart.

  1. Fear of Confrontation: People may fear adverse reactions, anger, or hurt feelings when ending a connection. Ghosting can be seen as an avoidance strategy to sidestep these uncomfortable emotions.

How to Cope with Ghosting:

  1. Practice Self-Care: Feeling hurt, confused, or frustrated when ghosted is normal. Allow yourself to process these emotions and practice self-care. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation.

  1. Reflect on the experience: While it can be painful, take the time to reflect on the experience. Consider whether early red flags or signs indicated a lack of genuine interest or compatibility.

  1. Resist Blaming Yourself: Ghosting primarily reflects the other person's communication style and issues, not your worth or desirability. Avoid blaming yourself for their actions.

  1. Set Boundaries: Consider setting boundaries and expectations for communication in future online dating interactions. It's okay to express your desire for respectful and honest communication.

  1. Move Forward: While processing your feelings is important, don't dwell on the experience. Keep an open mind and continue meeting new people. Only some people engage in ghosting, and you may find a more respectful and compatible match in the future.

  1. Seek Support: Talk to friends or a therapist about your experience if you find it challenging to cope with ghosting. They can provide emotional Support and guidance.

Ghosting is undoubtedly a challenging aspect of online dating. Communication, respect, and empathy are key to building healthy online connections. Finding someone who values open and honest communication is crucial for a successful and fulfilling online dating experience.

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Psychotherapist Helen Hadden

Helen Hadden Psychotherapist